Tales from the Bartender

I have often pondered in my vacant hours the topic of good guys and bad guys. In our culture and the overall stereotypical point of view on the subject is that the good guy always wins in the end. To be perfectly honest I am greatly appalled by this statement due to the fact that I am and probably will always be a bad guy. In the brief span of my acting stint I have always landed the role of the mean, overbearing and downright nasty person. With each passing role I have grown accustomed to internalizing and applying various techniques in emphasizing the evil that is present in a role. It seems as though that this internalizing has managed to spill itself out of the pages of my script and into my daily life. This lies in the truth that the bad guy or the antagonist has no right to ever be happy. To tell you the truth, at the start I thought it was the biggest load of bullshit that I had ever heard. But in light of recent events I now see that it is possible that a bad guy will forever be alone. The warm fuzzy feeling that I got from the movie “Annie” has now expired and I have returned to my old bitter self. I once tried to love. In that brief instant I was willing to change my life, my personality and habits for the better. But in the end it exploded in my face and I got my feelings hurt. Some people may say that it was my fault and that I was insensitive. HOW THE HELL WAS I INSENTIVE?!!!!! It seems as though my storybook character has imprinted a permanent mark on my being that I will always be at fault. God! That sucks! I have been cast in the undying role of the patsy or the fall guy. I have done no crime but I was still judged accordingly. I am not pleading for innocence with this statement for I know that in some way I may have done something wrong. I have never hidden the fact that I am not a saint and that I am not the easiest guy to be around with. But all I ask from people is that they listen to both sides of the story before they judge me.